The Midwesterners' Guide To Charleston Relocation

Top 10 things every Midwesterner needs to know before moving to Charleston:

Road signs are optional, not required.

Phantom braking, leaving the turn signal on, and going 15 mph under the speed limit in the left lane is considered “Southern Hospitality”.

They utilize pleasant names for unpleasant things. Such as Palmetto Bugs and Debutant Balls.

It is socially acceptable for men to wear pastel pink, polka dot bow ties, croakies, Sperry’s (AKA Boat shoes for the non-acclimated readers) and to pop their collars.

If an accident occurs on the side of the road/bridge, it is a customary courtesy for the driver on the opposite side of the road to cease driving in order to block traffic on both sides of the road to keep the status quo.

Instead of marking liquor stores with the ambiguous words “Liquor or Party” they are clearly marked with a procession of 3 dots with the easily equated words of “Package Store”.

“Gone with the Wind” is considered a cult classic.

Their enchanting native dance is called “The Shag”.

Pearls are not just an accessory; they are a right of passage.

Most of the male populace is comprised of Seamen, Jar Heads and Knobs.